Coaching Corner: 10 Steps to Getting Started TODAY

Feel like a little motivational interviewing?  Grab paper and a pen and let’s get started…

1.  First, ask yourself what you’d really like to accomplish. (Write it down).

2.  Funny thing – most of you probably didn’t really write down what you really want.  So let’s try again.  What causes you to want what you first wrote down?  (somewhere in this response is probably the correct answer.

• Here’s an example
  
  
  
  • I want to lose weight.
  
  
  
  

• I want to feel satisfied with my body by feeling confident in my appearance and live without physical restrictions (even fatigue) as I go through each day.

3.  Okay, now, what’s preventing you from getting what you want? Be honest.  (Make a list.)

4.  Circle the things you have control over.

5.  What changes could you make to change these barriers and move you towards your goal?  (come up with several solutions – this is called brainstorming)

6.  Pick 1-3 changes from the list that you think you could start with today or tomorrow.

7.  On a Scale of 1-10, how confident are you that you can make this change or changes?

• (If you’ve answered less than 7, what could increase your confidence of success?)
  
  
  
  • You might try committing to less time, finding a supportive friend, committing to a couple days or 1 week rather than forever….
  
  
  
  


• If you’ve answered 7 or higher, you are ready to make this change.

8.  Clearly state your goal on paper.  Yes… write it down.

• Be specific – if your goal is about fitness or healthy eating, how many times per day/per week are you committed to following your plan.  Maybe you are researching healthy places to get lunch or a personal trainer.  Reserve a date and time in your calendar to complete this task.

9.  Below your goal, re-write why you are committing to taking these steps.  What’s motivating you?

10.  GO!!!

The Importance of Balanced Fitness

In January, I shared some insight on my personal journey back into fitness. Over the past couple of years, between pregnancies, my consistency has been... well, it just hasn't. I committed to a gym membership back in January and also signed up to run a 1/2 marathon in March. Since moving to Hilton Head in 2005, running has become one of my favorite hobbies. During my training for the race I participated in a few weeks ago, I couldn't help but wonder how hard I would be on myself the day of the race. With a pace about 2 minutes slower than my race pace was a few years ago (you runners know that is a significant difference) I was sure I wasn't going to be proud of my performance.

But you know what? That's not what happened. Instead of spending those 13 miles comparing where I was the last time I ran a 1/2 marathon, I began to truly acknowledge the change I've made over the past couple of months. At mile 10 I realized that my arms and upper body weren't tired. A couple of years ago when I took up running again without a strength training program, my back and arms would always fatigue before my legs or stamina. This was just the “ah-ha” experience I needed. When it comes to weight loss, I'm like everyone else - I initially gravitated to just focusing on cardio workouts. This race demonstrated on a more personal level how crucial it is to also focus on strength training, core strength, and even balance and flexibility for overall success. The running portion of my training played a significant role in my preparation, but now I see that my strength training and core routine was just, if not more significant.

If you are new to strength training, try this Body Sculpting routine. There are even more free fitness routines available right here on H3Daily.

Women's Life Expectancy Goes Down - What Now?

According to a recent study, the life expectancy for some populations in US women have gone down. The most significant changes were noticed in rural counties in the South and West. Some experts are blaming smoking, obesity and lower education, but more research is needed to label the trend. Researchers are curious about these changes as it relates to the trend in longevity for men, which seems to be growing at a different rate.

At H3, we are much less concerned about life expectancy than we are about quality of life. Forget life expectancy, how can you live your life to the fullest each and every day? Take care of you body because you get more OUT of life, not more OF life!

Ladies, check out how to live better (and likely live longer) with these tips from Bob Wright.

Gratitude Check

In the next 20 seconds, right down the top 5 things you're thankful for today….

If you wrote down a Person… have you taken the time to show them or tell them how much you appreciate them today?

If you wrote down an Event or experience… did you take the time to linger in that moment?

If you wrote down God… have you taken time to talk to him today?

If you wrote down Prosperity… have you recently shared with someone in need?

If you wrote down Health… have you done anything today to honor your body or meet its needs?

 

Think of a way to express your gratitude for at least 2 items on your list today.  Now, take a moment to reflect on what just happened…

Did a blanket of comfort wrap you with these warm thoughts?

Did a smile grow upon your face?

Do you feel an urge to do something positive?

Gratitude lifts spirits, instigates smiles, and compels you for more.  I’m grateful to share this moment with you today.

Crazy Things that De-rail us from our Weight Loss Plan

I’m sure you are probably tired of hearing “that’s no excuse” – whether it’s coming from someone else or even yourself. But the truth is we have excuses. There are reasons we don’t do the things we should do. Some of them may sound crazy, but regardless, they affect our ability to maintain our focus and motivation for weight loss.

Today’s message is not about “no excuses,” it’s about bolstering ourselves to overcome those roadblocks. So here we go:

1. You’re too sore from your last workout. Sometimes when we start a new exercise routine, we are so determined and ready for the change that we overdo it. Don’t go from couch potato to extremely-intense-exercise-maniac in one night. Oh, and warm up first.

2. Your grocery store changed its layout and now you can’t find your healthy favorites. Take a deep breath, you can do this. You’re not in a foreign land, they just changed your roadmap. Try narrowing your list to the essentials for now, and you can always go back later if necessary.

3. It’s too cold. The cold weather makes it harder to breath. Your hands a toes may get numb and your muscles tense to keep you warm which makes you uncomfortable… so workout inside today. Crunches, wall pushups, stairs… get creative!

4. My trainer moved. Okay, now I know this one can be challenging, but after all your time working with the trainer, you did learn some things right? Put those in play and begin your search immediately for a new trainer, I know that accountability can be critical.

5. I’m confused – are eggs good for me or bad for me? There is always new research, new studies, and many contradictions in the world of nutrition. Remember as Bob says, stick to the highway… no turns or dirt roads. As long as you keep the big picture in view, you’ll be fine.

6. The restaurant was out of the healthy option. As if there is only one healthy option. But in all honesty, it’s so easy to just throw your conscience out the window – I mean you made the first attempt to order healthy right? Just remember you’ll feel even better afterwards when you choose the right thing.

7. I’m sick and I don’t want to get worse.  Exercise can be difficult when you are sick, but if you just have a head cold, sometimes a little movement can help you feel better. Lower your intensity, but keep your routine going by committing to doing something.

8. I forgot my lunch at home. This one is screaming the “eat whatever I want” free card. Make a list of at least 3 healthy options that are convenient to grab on the run.

9. My friend is always late for our walk. Workout partners can be great, but they can also throw you off course. Find a way to keep moving even when they are running late. Or… you may need to find a new partner.

10. No one else around me is trying to lose weight, so they just don’t understand. Write down some reasons other than weight loss that help you choose to eat the right foods. Telling someone you are eating yogurt and blueberries because you love them and they remind you when you used to pick them with your Grandpa just sounds more fun that because it will help you lose weight.

So have you used any of these??? It’s okay, me too. Here’s to a smooth-sailing 2013!!

Managing Expectations Over the Holidays

It's that time of year again... Only about 6 weeks from Christmas and Thanksgiving is already upon us, life is about to move at jet speed.  With the ever so popular, fast-paced American lifestyle so many of us have adopted, the holiday season only exasperates our tendency to take on more than our days can hold.  And what gets pushed to the side?  The very habits we work so hard to develop throughout the rest of the year. 

It's difficult to adjust our expectations when it come to weight loss, especially when it never seems to come off as fast as we like.  But with holiday parties, holiday food gifts, tighter schedules and less time for exercise, managing our expectations with all these added variables becomes critical to our success.  Remember that weight maintenance can also be considered a success, especially if your track record is to gain 5+ pounds over this time of year.  Here are a few strategies to help manage your expectations this holiday season...

• Pledge to maintain 17 out of 21 weekly meals that follow your nutritional plan.


• Commit to a minimum of 15 minutes of activity at your regularly scheduled exercise time. You will be more likely to pick things back up after the holidays if you fit to at least a little exercise in your schedule.


• Set an allowance (as opposed to a limit) for wine and/or holiday treats at your holiday parties.


• Define a go-to stress reliever that lives outside the refrigerator. Close your eyes and take 10 deep breaths, complete 5 chair squats, smile and recite your holiday season mantra in your head...whatever will keep you out of the munchies!


• Remind yourself that each day is a new day. Prevent one "bad meal" from turning into a "bad week".

Gift us your holiday success tips today!

Lessons Learned: Acknowledge Small Successes

Motivated by her retirement date in sight, my mom has been focusing hard on her health over the past 3 months. With plans to relocate to Hilton Head so she can spend more time with her grandchildren, she is driven to have the energy to enjoy her time with them. Signing on to a new corporate wellness program with her company, she has found support, encouragement, accountability, and easy access to information and activities that has helped her along the way.

This past Friday she was scheduled for her weekly weigh in. She had informed me earlier in the week that she thought she was on target to receive acknowledgment for 3 milestone goals - 5 pound star, a 25-pound charm, and her first 10% mark. She's admitted that it's been challenging for her to recognize each weekly 1/2 pound or 1 1/4 pound weight loss as progress, so needless to say she was looking forward to these with much anticipation.

When Friday finally came, a 3-pound loss for the week earned her 2 of the 3 milestones (only 0.8 pounds from earn her 10% mark). Overall, she still felt proud about her success.... That is, until she met with the wellness consultant. You see, the week's activity was to review her personal food log and review the areas that need improvement in terms of following the nutrition plan. She was told that she was supposed to be getting 2 teaspoons of healthy oils in daily, and that she would not lose weight unless she followed the plan exactly as written. Aside from the fact that this is a misguided statement (that's another blog in itself), my mom came from the discussion now focused on what she was doing "wrong." Forget the fact that she's eating more fruits and vegetables daily than she has in 2 years... Or that she is now doing a combination of walking, using a pedometer, biking, and attending Zumba when she's been sedentary for years... Or that her doctor took her off her blood pressure medication... Or that she can now discuss her weight and her actions around food without tears involved....No! Talk about poor timing! It broke my heart. Luckily she's heard me ramble enough about the successes some of our guests have had that she moved past it and accepted the challenge of getting in some healthy oils.

Lesson learned - it is imperative to celebrate your small successes. While it is important to review your plan and make adjustments when needed to continue your success, do not dismiss the opportunity to acknowledge the changes you have made. That 10% mark is a BIG deal, and it doesn't come every week, so it is absolutely critical to treat it as noteworthy. Congratulations Mom!!!

No matter how big or small... Share your most recent success with us and motivate another to stay the course.

Lessons Learned: Healthy Environments

 



Logic tells us that environments affect our behavior. It makes so much sense when we consider examples like flowers and their need for soil, sun and water; or kids who grow up around gang activity and end up following that same path. Why is it so difficult for us to apply this same important observation to our ability to live healthy lives? We learn how to apply our critical thinking skills to problem solving in our careers... We need to use those same skills to create an environment that breeds healthy living. Here are some ideas to get started:

1.  Break Room Bests: At the beginning of the week encourage co-workers to donate a fruit of choice to be shared throughout the week. A bag of apples, a bunch of bananas... Before you know it, you've just filled the break room with an assortment of fresh fruits instead of donut boxes or candy bars.


2. Walking lunches: Scout out your neighboring areas with a fresh look to see if there are any new healthy lunch spots within walking distance. You'll be surprised how helpful that 10 minute walk is, along with controlling your portions and skipping dessert. A little fresh air never hurts either!


3. Get organized: If it takes 10 minutes or your entire afternoon, the time spent organizing can be priceless in terms of efficiency and stress management.


4. Add color: Blue for creativity, red for details... Whether it’s painting a room or just adding some flare to your desktop background, color can be such an inspiration.


5. Make a commitment: Set a deadline for the first piece to a large project, or pick an activity and ask a friend to commit along with you for support. Mark it on your calendar. Goals without deadlines never make the transition to accomplishments.


6. Identify the weed: Identify one obstacle that's in your way of achieving your goals; this could be anything from "your kids' Oreos", your snooze button, or even a sabotaging friend or spouse. What can you do to minimize your exposure to that obstacle.

Change your environment, change your life!!!

Lessons Learned: (Re)Finding Treasures

For the past week, my preschooler, Hala, had been finding, what most would call random things (i.e. trash), and bringing them to me saying, “Look Mama, I found a treasure!” A missing blue bead, a leaf from the house plant, a piece of dried pasta that never made it into the pot… you know, all that stuff kid’s seem to find. She’s holding the items ever so carefully and looking at them like they are about to unveil the secret of life. The fascination is so positive, like she cannot wait to learn all that she can about this newfound treasure.

Hala’s preschool follows the Reggio Emilia Approach, a philosophy that is based on the principles of respect, responsibility, and community through exploration and discovery in a supportive and enriching environment based on the interests of the children through a self-guided curriculum. The children are encouraged to explore their curiosity about things, ask questions, and then figure out how to learn the answers. These problem solving skills are critical to life and it’s the process that needs to be learned, not necessarily the final answer. In this approach, there is a lot of discovery and self-satisfaction that really enhances self esteem and self worth.

As adults, there are many things that we take for granted or dismiss as unimportant that may otherwise in fact help us keep a positive outlook on our lives and our achievements. When you were getting ready this morning, did you stop and smile at yourself in the mirror? Did you allow your mind to linger for a moment on that special memory as you put your jewelry on? Did you notice the absence of that annoying pain in your lower back when you got out of bed, since you’ve re-committed to your exercise plan? Did you stop for a second to enjoy the warmth that your hands felt as you wrapped them around your coffee cup? Did you enjoy your breakfast as if you were tasting it for the first time—or did you rush through the meal to get on with your day? Don’t dismiss these small details as unimportant. Small successes and accomplishments are what we use as building blocks for self esteem and self worth which lead to positive reinforcement for change or continued healthy habits.

Today’s task: Discover a part of your world in a new light. Experience it if for the first time and linger in the satisfaction it brings you.

[caption id="attachment_8630" align="alignright" width="420" caption="Hala at preschool"][/caption]

Lessons Learned: The Real Purpose of Time-out

This past week was a milestone week for my family. Hala started pre-school!! So of course we had to do the proud parent thing and take pictures, visit the classroom, ask about her day and what her new friends’ names were… you know, all that first day of school stuff.

What also comes with this exciting new transition??? Change. Our routine changes – now Daddy takes Hala to school and picks her up, while I take the other two to daycare. On Mondays, nap items and fruit to share need to be taken to school, and on Fridays nap items come home to get cleaned. Fundraisers begin, fall breaks to plan, and on and on and on.

In the midst of all this, last night I had to put Hala in time-out for refusing to share with her sister. I thought to myself, man, I wish I could be in time-out. Sometimes it seems as though it’s a luxury to have the time to take a breath between the day’s hustle and bustle. I’m not sure where exactly that transition in thinking changes, but at some point we begin to recognize “time-out” is not as punishment, but a gift of time. It signifies a break in momentum in one direction and an opportunity to redirect our energy toward something better.

Give yourself a “time-out” today and recognize it as a chance to change your momentum. Given this opportunity, what path will you take??

Share it with us! Post a comment on the change you are looking to make today!

Lesson’s Learned: Love and Behavior

Five years ago, this month, my Grandmother passed away.  That night, in her home of more than 50 years, she was surrounded by her entire family – husband, children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren, singing one of her favorite hymns as she took her last breath.  She has always been the rock of our family.  Hard-working and extremely well prepared and organized, she also had a contagious laugh that would sweep the entire room.  She would purchase next year’s Christmas gifts during the post-holiday sales, wrap and tag them, and by the following year, forget what she had gotten everyone. She would always joke that she did it that way so she could be surprised too. 

And, she had a love language that spoke volumes to me.  She had 3 daughters – for my mother, she would pick us up every day from school and keep us until Mom got home from work.  For her eldest daughter that worked in our school kitchen, she would volunteer her time every morning to prepare and serve the school lunch, because the school could not afford to pay another worker to help my Aunt.  For her youngest daughter, who had 3 small children of her own, my Grandmother would drive across town each week to clean her house and finish numerous loads of laundry.  As I grew up, I admired my Grandmother for many things, but most of all it was for her love.  I valued the relationship she and my Grandfather had, so much that it’s what I’ve always dreamed to have for myself in a relationship. 

Now that I have 3 children of my own, I’m beginning to notice some patterns and practices that seem very familiar to me.  Bottom line, it all relates to the language of Love.  You may have heard of Gary Chapman’s book:  The 5 Love Languages.  (I know, you probably just checked your browser to make sure you were reading the right blog – you’re still on H3Daily… just trust me, it will come full circle on how this relates to health J…)  As described in the book, the 5 Love Languages are as follows: 

1. Words of Affirmation


2. Quality Time


3. Receiving Gifts


4. Acts of Service


5. Physical Touch

Clearly, my Grandmother’s love language was acts of service, which I certainly gravitate more to myself.  I’ve noticed my oldest daughter, Hala, seems to respond more to quality time and physical touch.  If I consciously take the time to engage in a specific activity with her, her behavior is much better.  I am naturally better at showing my love through acts of service, and I have to work harder on showing through physical touch or even words of affirmation. 

The way we demonstrate love for others, as well as our perception of how others love us can have a large impact on our behavior.  If we do not feel love from those closest to us, it can impact our self esteem or even lead to depression, which in turn may impact our weight.  If your focus on diet and exercise has not lead to success, what are you missing?  Take this assessment to learn what your Love Language is, what words or actions make you feel less loved, and how others might be expressing a love that you aren’t recognizing.  Discover the impact this has on your relationships and experience the improvement this understanding may have on your health. 

Affirmation of the Day:  “Believing there is a solution paves the way to a solution.” – Dr. David Schwartz

Lessons Learned: Try it on for Size

Last week we took Hala to visit her new preschool since she’s starting in August. She held my hand as we walked down to see her classroom and meet her teacher. The teacher met her with a smile and welcomed her to look around. There were some children sitting at a table working on arts and crafts. Hala eyed this up first even sitting down and visualizing herself participating with the other kids. After a minute or so, she got up to check out the rest of the room.  On one side there was a message center where the students could go a prepare messages for the parents or others, and a light center where they could explore the ways light projects through various objects, creating images projected on the wall. The other side of the room was filled with more activity areas including a structure center with blocks and other building materials, a technology center and a play kitchen complete with dress-up clothes. As Hala found a couple of bracelets to put on and picked out a princess dress in the kitchen area, the teacher informed us that it seems to be the spot that most of the children migrate to first, before feeling comfortable exploring the other areas of the room.

It was very interesting to observe her as she took it all in. We’ve been talking about her starting school (she says she’s going to [South Carolina] Gamecocks school) for weeks now so we wanted to show her where it was and what it was like so she can look forward to it with anticipation. By putting her in the environment, it allowed her to visualize what pre-school was going to be like and what she could expect when she gets there. She was able to see other children playing and being creative and learning, and even picture herself doing those things as well.

While I understand that, for some of us, the anticipation of joining a new gym, Weight Watchers or health resort, isn’t always something we look forward to, the change in environment can be very impactful. By surrounding yourself with healthy foods or fitness equipment/classes, it provides the opportunity to at least look at them and consider using them. You might get the courage to walk a little closer and check it out. Add some friendly faces that share the same common goal, with some experience at it too, and watch out! You might just find yourself starting that program you’ve “been meaning to for awhile now, but just [insert excuse here].”

If you find yourself struggling to get started, what can you change about your environment that might set you in motion?

• Visit your local fitness center for a tour, or watch the first 10 minutes of that Zumba class you’ve been considering.


• Check out that new Salad shop around the corner.


• Make a list of 2 or 3 friends you can reach out to who are currently working on their own weight or health.


• Put your walking shoes by your bed or by the door, in a visual place instead of the back of the closet.


• Start with something recognizable before trying the latest fitness craze or the vegetable you hated as a kid.


• Expose yourself to a walking club or Weight Watcher’s group, and see if the shoe fits…. Believe me, sooner or later you’ll find one that will.

 

Lessons Learned: What’s Next, Mama?

So this morning, as I was getting ready for work and teaching my middle one about brushing her teeth (i.e. stick the toothbrush in the water and suck the water off, only to repeat numerous times), my oldest one wakes up and comes into my bathroom. We are in a routine of picking her clothes out the night before and setting them out so that she can get dressed herself when she wakes up (however, her underwear and socks have been moved to a lower drawer so she can reach them. She likes to get those on her own…this is an important note for later).

As you might guess… she was not dressed. She proceeded to sit on the floor and whine because Jada got to brush her teeth and she wanted to do that. I calmly responded that she could brush her teeth with her new bubblegum flavored toothpaste if she went back to her room and got dressed first. She responded with enthusiasm and went off to conquer the task. When she returned, she was rewarded with her turn to sit on the counter and use her new toothpaste. I noticed she was missing socks, so as we went back to her room to get them, another thought popped into my head… her socks are in the same drawer as her underwear, I wonder if she’s missing those too. She was. After several requests and a deeper explanation of why we wear underwear than I ever thought I would give, she agreed to put them on.

Now, we were finally ready to go downstairs. The youngest one was waking up, ready for a dry diaper, change of clothes and a bottle, the middle one whining because she wants her breakfast, and here’s my oldest… “What’s next, Mama?” She always wants to know what’s next, what are we going to do now? I smiled to myself as I went to get Daddy for another pair of hands.

When it comes to losing weight, sometimes I feel like I want to be a little kid again. I want to take shortcuts to get to my goal faster. I want to skip exercise some days for some lame excuse, or eat all healthy meals, only to sabotage myself with an impulse on sweet snacks. I want to sit on the floor and pout when the scale doesn’t show me the results I’m looking for. I want to look for a new solution or a quick fix, because obviously everything I’ve tried just isn’t working.

Just as I know Hala will eventually understand why we wear underwear, we need to understand that taking shortcuts with our health will not lead us to successful weight loss. The lesson learned? Patience. We know how to eat. We know how to exercise, it’s just waking up in the morning and deciding I’m going to do it right today. No shortcuts. What was your mindset when you woke up today? What will it be tomorrow?

10 Health Screenings Women Should Not Avoid

In addition to a balanced diet, exercise and stress management, it is also important to stay current with any screenings that are available to us for early detection of any disease or illnesses that we may be susceptible to. For women, there are 10 screenings that are recommended:

1. Mammography. The American Cancer Society recommends a yearly screening starting at are also age 40. Self breast exams recommended in your 20’s and 30’s.
2. Pap Test. This screening tests for cervical cancer, and should start as early as age 21.
3. DXA Exam. The DXA (dual energy x-ray absorptiometry) exam tests for osteoporosis. A yearly exam is recommended for women over 65, but younger women with risk factors should also get tested. This exam is crucial as it threatens about half of American women over age 50.
4. Skin Exam. A routine skin exam by a dermatologist or other doctor is recommended in addition to self skin exams. It is important to look for changes in size, shape or color of any marks on your skin.
5. Blood Pressure. Risk for high blood pressure increases as you age, so it is important to have it checked routinely. With complications like heart disease and stroke, this is a simple screening that can make a world of difference, and diet and exercise can play a big role in lowering risk for complications.
6. Cholesterol. High cholesterol can also lead to heart disease and stroke. Looking at the complete picture – HDL cholesterol, LDL cholesterol, and Triglycerides – can help your physician define a plan that will work best for you to control your levels, in addition to your diet and exercise. Adults over age 20 should have a blood panel run every 5 years.
7. Blood glucose. With an estimated 1/3 of Americans having diabetes and not knowing it, and diabetes ranking 7th as a cause of death, this screening is becoming more and more important. For those with normal risk, the recommendation is to be tested every 3 years starting at age 45. Weight can increase your risk for developing diabetes, so earlier testing may be essential for some.
8. ELISA. ELISA is the first test for detecting HIV, the virus that causes Aids. While there is still no cure, screening can prevent the spread of the disease and early treatment with anti-HIV medications may help the body fight the virus.
9. Colonoscopy. The screening for colorectal cancer, the third most common cancer in women (after breast and lung), is recommended for those with average risk starting at age 50. Polyps, which can turn into cancer in the future, can be removed during the screening.
10. Eye Exam. A screening for Glaucoma can be included in an eye exam. It’s a disease that affects the optic nerve and can cause blindness. All adults are recommended to have an eye exam that includes a test for Glaucoma every 3 to 5 years.

So today, as you are writing out the infamous to-do list, add a line to call for an appointment if you are due for any of these critical screenings! You won’t regret it!

Wish you could throw a temper tantrum?

How did we get so good at hiding our feelings?  Is it something we learned over time because certain displays of emotion are “socially unacceptable”? You could consider my household a science lab for emotional display right now, with a 2-month old, a 14-month old, a 3-year-old you can imagine…throw in a work-a-holic Dad and Mom still coming off the pregnancy-hormone wave, and the show is on! 

My youngest is in that happy, smiling, laughing, cooing stage that brings a tear to my eye every single time I look at his face.  It’s such a genuine display of happiness that you never ever want to forget it.  Next to him, the 14-month old is in an almost constant state of frustration because she can’t quite say everything she wants to just yet, but she wants to tell you so badly!  Which translates to… whining.  Add the 3-year-old’s dance between asserting herself and gaining your approval and its one big ball of fun.  But when you step back and look again, you know that their emotions are so raw, and so honest.  There is NO question what they are feeling in the moment. 



It may not be socially acceptable for a grown person to throw a tantrum, but you know what, it’s got to be healthier than stuffing our feelings and carrying them around with us forever.  Keeping our emotions bottled up inside causes a stress on the body that is simply not healthy. It is hard for us to understand the role stress plays on our health because we can’t see it in plain sight, and we often don’t give credit where credit is due.  Check out this brief article from Mayo Clinic for a list of effects stress has on our body, feelings and behavior.

So today, whether you need a good cry, a foot-stomping, hair-pulling tantrum, or even just an uncontrollable bout of floor-rolling laughter, give yourself permission to do just that (you may want to shut your office door first). I guarantee it will be healthier for you than bottling it up inside.

The Mind Game

If you’ve visited Hilton Head Health in recent years, there’s a good chance that I was pregnant when you met me – our family started growing in 2008, and now, in 2012, I’m back from giving birth to my third little blessing – my son Jaden.  His two big sisters love him dearly and cannot wait for him to grow up so they can play together.  He is cooing and smiling, all the things we love that babies do.  He is a joy to cuddle with and has been my 24-7 side-kick for the past now 11 months. 

It’s easy to talk about the love of a new baby, but, of course as any of you fellow mother’s know, it can take quite a bit of positive self-talk to learn to love your post-partum body.  I mean seriously, does the baby have to destroy all of your abs??  All joking aside, it does take a lot of mental strength to build your confidence and motivation to keep working on your physical fitness and health.  That’s true for any type of set back – be it a baby, an injury, a stressful or emotional period – the battle of the mind is the one that must be conquered first.  If you’re finding yourself in a low right now when it comes to your health and fitness, here are some ideas that might help you win the mind game:

1.  Find a source of accountability.  Whether it be a journal, a supportive friend, or even a coach, the accountability will help force you to look at your progress and keep pushing until you get some momentum going on this Change Train.


2. Set a date.  A birthday, a vacation, a 5K… whatever it may be, find something that you will look forward to and give yourself a deadline.  This will help create priority for your goal.


3. Think positive.  Make a list of all the reasons you can achieve your goals.  Write them down.  We are so good at telling ourselves why we can’t be successful… and then we’re not.  That mental part does take some effort, but it definitely helps with the physical.


4. History is history.  Don’t dwell on poor decisions made in the past or what you did or didn’t do yesterday – just focus on what really matters.  What can you do right now?


5. Just do it.  Just get started!  Often times if you make one healthy choice it leads to one more, even when it’s not planned!  Odds are you will get some positive kickback in one form or another!

 Today, I packed a healthy lunch and snacks for work.  What is one thing you did for your health today?

Making Change Stick

When many of us have a desire to make change, it’s easy to go straight to the Nike mentality of “Just Do It”; however, when we look at models for successful and lasting change, there are many other components.  Behavioral steps are just one building block of fifteen, for example, in the model for Mount Lasting Change. 

As you think back to your efforts for making behavioral changes and it seems that you always fall short, or the change is short-lived, I would encourage you to take a look at some of the other building blocks for making successful change.  Looking at it 360 degrees can really help identify some areas for improvement, which is much more beneficial in the long run than the guilt and self-loathing we run ourselves through.  Here are a couple of those blocks to start with:

1. Responsibility & Self-discovery – You have to be ready, willing and able to make change.  Spend some time thinking about your level of motivation, your feelings about getting started and your confidence that you will succeed.  What can you do to help bolster your readiness, willingness and ability to make the change you are seeking?


2. Strengths – What are you really good at?  What about you has made you successful in other areas of your life?  How can you use these skills/talents to increase your ability to make the change you want?


3. Values & Meaning – What do you value most as you envision your life having made this change?  What are some ways you can kindle that motivation to help you in times where your mind/emotions begin to pull you off course?


4. Benefits & Information – What are the pros of making this change last?  What information would be helpful?


5. Challenges & Strategies – What are the cons of the change?  Whether these things are actual negatives, or they just seem negative for our selfish, defiant nature, they are still real feelings we experience due to the change.  If you can really decipher how you truly feel about making a change, it will lead you to coming up with realistic strategies for dealing with those challenges

Take your time with these steps.  Don’t rush through and move straight into action as we do over and over and over again.  What is going to be different this time?  It’s not the behavior goal that really changes… it’s the support you build around making that behavior more meaningful, more do-able and with more confidence. 

What have you discovered about yourself today?

Big Or Small

Every day we are faced with making decisions.  What will I have for dinner?  Should I get up to exercise in the morning or try and fit it in after work?  What preschool should I send my children to?  Am I saving enough for retirement?  Should I get that preventive diagnostic test – what if they find something wrong with me?  Whether it is a financial commitment, a change in your career, committing to the love of your life, or simply an apple or a Snicker’s bar at snack time…we are constantly facing the need to make a decision about something.

Sometimes this seems overwhelming.  I know I drive my friends and family crazy with the dreaded “what do you want for dinner?” question.  Unless I’m truly craving something, I have a hard time being the one to make the decision because I don’t want to pick something the other person doesn’t really want.  You can imagine if I have trouble with this small question, the anxiety some of the larger decisions cause! 

That’s why I like to ask myself this one simple question – “Is it Big or Small?”  I think it really helps me in two ways: 1) if the answer is small, then it reminds me there is no real harm in making the decision and moving forward either way, and 2) if the answer is big, I work to bring my mind out of the emotion of the decision and try to get a clearer view of the facts, weigh the pros and cons, and make the decision from that mindset rather than the emotional scrambled thoughts that tend to rise so naturally.

So whatever decision you are facing today, just ask yourself, is it Big or Small?  Then go from there… and go with passion, confidence and energy… because if you don’t, you truly will not be able to tell if you made the right decision or not because your heart’s not in it.  Wishing you all the best in your Big and Small decisions!

Strategies To Step Back Into Meal Planning

While meal planning is essential to weight loss or weight management, it can be challenging for many.  There is no single right way to meal plan and many factors affect how we do it and how consistent we are.  Our palettes change, life demands more time in other areas, travel, motivation, levels shift… whatever the reason, if we look at meal planning from an “all or nothing” approach, we will not find success.  Be realistic with your planning, even if that means starting with planning 2 meals for the week, because having success in that will only bolster your confidence to take on more the next week.  If you’ve been through our program, you may likely have attended my class where we work as a group to develop a 7-day meal plan.  Here are some steps to consider if a 7-day plan just seems too overwhelming for this coming week:

1.  Break it down.  Start by just planning 3 meals for the upcoming week instead of all 21.  This allows for some flexibility with yourself but still moves you closer to your goal.  You might even surprise yourself and eat healthier for a few more meals as well.


2. Develop a Routine.  Give your week a basic framework that might help guide your thoughts to specific meals.  For example:




• Monday is Chicken Night – whether it’s grilled chicken, chicken parmesan or chicken marsala… it’s going to be chicken.


• Tuesdays/Thursdays are Seafood night – one week might include H3 Shrimp Scampi and Salmon, the next week might be H3 Crab Cakes or Lemon Parmesan Tilapia.


• Wednesday is Salad night – Steak Salad, Grilled Chicken Salad, Spinach Salad with Tempeh… whatever you choose, it’s going on a bed of greens.


• Friday night’s “Where’s the Beef?” – Steak, lean burger, Spaghetti with meatballs… you get my drift.


• Pizza Saturday and Wild Card Sunday – keep it fun on your weekend by making pita pizzas or even homemade whole wheat dough.  Sunday is your wild card to be spontaneous!




3. Play “Go Fish” for meals out. Make a list of restaurants and what meals are “acceptable” to your healthy meal plan.  You could create a card for each meal.  When you choose, or need to dine out, select something from your cards.


4. Remove and Replace. Identify 1-2 food choices that are contributors to an unhealthy plan and replace them with a healthy alternative.  Decide what your alternatives are now and make it something you can look forward to.


5. Portions, Portions, Portions!  Get back into the habit of measuring.  Even if it’s still a “bad” food, know how much you are consuming.


6. Write it down.  If at the beginning of the week you have every intention of eating healthy, and that always seems to fade mid week, you might forget all the healthy planning you did!  Don’t just plan in your head.  Write it down so you can refer back to it.  

Are You Ready?

This morning I went in for my pre-natal visit, and when my doctor informed me that I would be coming in now every 2 weeks, it suddenly hit me how quickly my due date is approaching!  Because I’m a planner by nature, my mind instantly went to, “Oh, my gosh, am I ready, what needs to be done?” 

Now, a few hours later, I’m settling into my thoughts.  Life has its way of hitting us with the unexpected, doesn’t it?  In my case, the event is expected, it’s the timeline that’s out of my hands.  No matter how much we prepare, there is always something that comes up that wasn’t in the picture we envisioned.  How resilient are you when “life” hits you with a whammy – positive or negative!?  Life’s curve balls are things like an injury, illness, divorce… but it can also be a surprise birthday party, a promotion that changes your routine, or, like me, a new little member to your family.

If you can keep a clear understanding of your vision and set forth each day with the mindset to do the best you can do that day to move closer to your vision, that’s really all you can ask of yourself.  Of course we all have days when we are ineffective or hinder that progress, but the sooner we can bounce back, the greater chance we have to realize that vision.  If we can ask ourselves, before each decision we make, “Will this take me closer or farther from my goal?”, and make the choice that takes us closer at least 7 out of 10 times, resilience is ours.   

What’s your vision?  Is your path still leading to one that motivates and inspires you?  What can you do today to take one step toward that goal?  If I could wish one thing for you for 2012… it would be Resilience.  Happy 2012!